Divorce Mediation vs. Litigation: Choosing the Right Path

Want to divorce without draining your bank account?

Divorce is hard. But making the wrong choice in how you approach it legally can make your life ten times harder. Most people think they need to fight it out in court. That’s not always the case.

Here’s the deal:

Mediation and litigation are two very different methods of divorce legal services. One keeps you in control of your future. The other hands your future over to a judge.

And the path you choose could save you thousands of dollars… or it could cost you everything.

What you’ll learn:

• What Is Divorce Mediation?
• What Is Divorce Litigation?
• The Real Cost Difference
• When Mediation Works Best
• When Litigation Makes Sense

What Is Divorce Mediation?

Divorce mediation is a process where both spouses work with a neutral third party. This person is known as a mediator. They will help you both come to agreements on topics such as property division, child custody, and support.

Here’s the key difference:

The mediator does not make decisions for you. They will simply help facilitate a conversation between you and your spouse. They can help you both see common ground. But all of the final agreements are made by you and your spouse.

This is why mediation is the perfect choice for couples who can still talk to each other. Even if things are strained, to some extent.

Talk to a trusted Colorado Springs divorce law firm to better understand what mediation is. Getting the right divorce legal services at the start prevents you from making costly mistakes further down the line.

Sessions are usually held in the mediator’s office. Both parties are present and able to speak their minds openly. The mediator ensures that both sides get a fair chance to be heard.

The result?

Agreements that work for both sides. Instead of having a judge hand down decisions that may or may not benefit you.

What Is Divorce Litigation?

Litigation is the traditional way of divorce in court. Each person has their own divorce attorney. Decisions are made by a judge if an agreement cannot be reached.

It involves lots of formal procedures. Court appearances and strict rules. Litigation can last for months. Even years in some cases.

Here is what most people don’t realize…

Litigation puts your entire fate in someone else’s hands. The judge will make the decision on how to divide your property and assets. The judge will decide on child custody. The judge will decide how much support you need to pay.

You no longer have control.

That is not to say that litigation is a bad thing. In certain cases it is necessary. But for a lot of divorcing couples, it creates more problems than it solves.

The Real Cost Difference

Let’s talk about money.

The cost difference between mediation and litigation is huge. And the figures speak for themselves.

A recent study revealed that 80% of couples who used mediation achieved a settlement agreement. They were able to avoid court entirely.

Here’s a typical example:

• Mediation costs: between $3,000 and $8,000 total
• Litigation costs: averaging at $20,000+

That is a massive difference. And this is even more costly for contested divorces. High conflict cases which go the route of litigation can amount to costs of hundreds of thousands of dollars.

But it does not stop at legal fees…

Litigation takes a long time. Time which equates to taking more time off work. The process can affect your job performance due to stress. Plus there is a large amount of uncertainty in regards to your financial future.

Mediation takes a few months. Litigation can take a year or more.

Time is money. And divorce already takes a significant amount of both.

When Mediation Works Best

Mediation works best in certain situations. Identifying these situations can help you to make the right decision.

Mediation works when:

• Both spouses are able to speak to each other in a reasonable manner
• Neither party has anything to hide when it comes to their finances
• You wish to maintain a co-parenting relationship with your spouse
• Privacy is a priority for you
• You want a quick and cost-effective solution

Parents in particular see a lot of benefit from mediation. Studies have shown that 54% of parents who achieved joint custody were successful by using mediation as a part of their divorce proceedings.

Here’s why that is important:

Children do much better when their parents can work together. Mediation reduces conflict. It creates a healthier foundation for co-parenting post divorce.

The more collaborative nature of mediation also preserves relationships. You and your spouse will not be staying married. But you can still treat each other like human beings.

And everything is kept private. Your private matters will not be part of the public court records.

When Litigation Makes Sense

Litigation may be needed in some cases. Knowing when litigation is necessary is also important.

Litigation is needed when:

• There is a presence of domestic violence or abuse
• One spouse is refusing to negotiate in good faith
• You have complex assets which require investigation
• One party is hiding assets or money from the other
• There are serious disagreements in regards to child custody

Here is the truth…

Not all divorces are able to be mediated. If your spouse is unwilling to budge or compromise in any way. Mediation is likely to fail. If there is a history of abuse. Being sat in front of your abuser is not safe. Nor is it a productive solution.

In this case, having a judge hand down legally binding decisions is the only way to protect the vulnerable party. The court system is there for a reason.

Litigation also provides legal protections. Formal processes of discovery can uncover hidden assets. Orders handed down by the court are legally enforceable. The documented procedures ensure a transparent and clear record of the entire case.

Making Your Decision

Deciding between mediation and litigation is a personal decision. There is no one size fits all solution.

Begin by asking yourself:

• Can we still speak to each other without erupting into a constant battle?
• Is there any sort of history of abuse or manipulation?
• How complex are our financial arrangements?
• Do we have children who need protection?
• What can we truly afford?

A lot of couples opt to begin with mediation. If that does not work, they can always start litigation. But once you start down the path of litigation, you cannot take that back.

It is a good idea to seek professional advice before making any final decisions. The right divorce legal services can set you in the direction which is best for your specific circumstances.

Remember this:

The goal of divorce is not to be the winner. The goal of divorce is to move on with your life.

Pulling It All Together

Divorce mediation and litigation are two very different experiences. One is collaborative in nature. The other is highly adversarial. One can cost you thousands. The other can cost tens of thousands.

For those couples who are still able to communicate with one another, mediation provides a faster solution. It is a more cost-effective option. And the higher percentage of success shows that it is a better option for everyone involved.

But there are situations where litigation is the only option. Abuse, hidden assets and a complete unwillingness to cooperate are all valid reasons to take your divorce to court. Do not force yourself to try mediation when there is no chance of it working.

The bottom line:

Your choice of divorce mediation or litigation will decide what your entire divorce experience is like. It will have an impact on your finances. Your children. Your mental health. And your ability to move on from it all.

Make the right choice. Seek the right guidance. And make your long-term wellbeing the priority.